BABB EP 59
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[00:00:00] Will we empower you to make evidence based, sustainable, and transformative changes for your health, leading to a more vibrant and fulfilling life? I'm your host, Abbey Stasier, a non diet registered dietitian, certified intuitive eating counselor, and master's graduate from Columbia University. I believe that we can't make a lasting or meaningful change single handedly.
So I'm so happy that you're here so that together you can see that a diet free, sustainable, healthy lifestyle is possible and you can leverage that to live a better life. And remember my disclaimer, this podcast is meant to give you general information and it's not meant to substitute or replace medical advice, a diagnosis, or service treatment.[00:01:00]
Abbie: Y'all, this episode, we just finished recording Hannah and I, y'all are going to love Hannah Calhoun. And this episode is so mind blowing. I learned so much. I had revelations. This is going to transform how you see yourself and give you so much more language for what you can say to yourself on a negative body image day when you feel like your body is just fighting against you.
And when you're feeling really frustrated. with yourself, your health and your happiness. Oh, so good. So Hannah and I actually connected on Instagram and that's how we found each other and she is just such a godsend. Love her. She's in her dietetic internship right now. She already has her master's in nutrition and dietetics.
And she also has a pediatric nutrition certification, which is really cool, all from Florida International University. So she's based in Miami. Slay girl! And she's about to graduate from her dietetic internship in January of 2024. So only a couple [00:02:00] months from this recording. We're very excited from her.
And she has a lot of experience with eating disorders at the residential level, post hospitalization. She's done intensive outpatient levels of care. Like, she has a lot of experience. And her Instagram account, which we'll link in the show notes, every. body. nutrition, every body nutrition is where she posts all of her evidence based content.
And that's how I found her. And I found her from this one post that she puts it like, say this, not that. And it's, she posted, you know, here's something that people normally say, and here's how to reframe that in a positive way. It was just. So good. So, so good. So I knew I had to bring her on the show so that we could talk about this more and now her and I have like become friends, like she's just so awesome.
So I can't wait to dive into this episode and for y'all to get these insights. It's incredible. So I'll see you in the interview.
Well, Hannah, thank you so much for being on with us today. We appreciate you joining the be about being better podcast. [00:03:00]
Hannah: Thank you for having me. I'm happy to be here.
Abbie: Yes, girl, thank you so much. I love connecting with you on Instagram and just following your journey.
And I was super inspired to do an episode like this based on several of your posts, like the series that you've been doing, say this, not that. Yeah. And I was like, Oh, we need to talk about that. Cause you had so many good reframes. I was like, "Slay girl, this is so good."
Hannah: You know, sometimes you make a post and you're like, Oh, I don't really know like how this one's going to do.
And. Yeah. Everybody, you know, really like resonated with it. And so, yeah,
Abbie: I was very pleased like we know that the thoughts that we're having, I think at some level that this is not serving us, this is maybe a more like destructive thought or just. You know, sending us down more of a shame spiral.
But if we don't have the language, if we don't have something to replace it with, and we only have that negative thought, like we'll just keep reinforcing that. Yeah.
Hannah: Yeah. And I think a [00:04:00] lot of people struggle too, because it's like, Oh, well, don't be so negative. , instead of saying , I hate my body, , say you love your body.
And people are like, well, I don't. And so I, I feel like a lot of the reframes that are out there that are, people are encouraged to say, aren't even really realistic. And so, instead of saying like, I hate my body, like you don't have to say, Oh my gosh, I love it so much. I'm so beautiful and amazing.
You could just say, I'm feeling a little uncomfortable with myself right now, and maybe even dig deeper and say, like, I'm feeling a little bloated or I'm feeling not very strong. So identifying exactly what you feel. So it's not like. You know, dipping our toes into toxic positivity, but it's like digging deeper into what we're feeling and naming it.
Abbie: Yes. And honoring that, like, it's okay to have feelings and negative feelings about your body. Like it, it's okay. It might not be necessarily serving you, but it's okay to acknowledge that because then you can start to work through it. And just because you have thoughts doesn't mean that you have to take disordered action on those thoughts.
Hannah: [00:05:00] Right. A hundred percent. 100%. And that, that really shows, someone who's, healing, whether they're healing from disordered eating behaviors or recovering from a diagnosed eating disorder, the thoughts might still be there, they might be less loud they might be in the back of our mind instead of in the forefront of our mind but it's really about what are we doing with those thoughts?
Are we taking them and running into, you know, disordered practices, disordered movement, disordered eating? Okay. Okay. Or are we like acknowledging them and just letting, letting the feelings exist, , or taking productive steps? To, to address how we're feeling. Like if I'm feeling super inflamed and bloated and stuff I might be like, okay, let me get out of these freaking skinny jeans and put on some more comfortable pants,
Abbie: you know, talking about this on Tik TOK.
And of course, this is the post that goes viral where I'm talking about how much weight I've gained and how my clothes don't fit. I was like. All right. Thanks y'all. No, but seriously, I do appreciate the views and the comments, but I'm just like, of
Hannah: course the [00:06:00] juicy details, a dietitian gained weight... Literally
Abbie: though.
And so I was talking about, I was like, Oh, fall is my favorite season. And like literally none of my fall clothes. Yeah. It's just so, you know, disappointing, frustrating. And I was just going down the shame spiral and I was like, I was having urges of going back into dining. Like, okay. Nope. Just because it doesn't mean I have to do anything about it. But I'm like, Oh, you know, I do need to buy some new clothes as frustrating as that is to spend money on that.
It having clothes that are stabbing me in my sides, squeezing me. I
Hannah: feel like I'm leaving like marks on your stomach or whatever on your waist. Oh, that's the worst
Abbie: it is. And it constantly is triggering me and reminding me that like I have gained weight. So it's bringing more attention to it, where if I just had clothes that fit, like, yes, it's uncomfortable to get a larger size.
It was already uncomfortable for me the last season to get the size that I had now I gotta get something larger. So that's something you have to reconcile. But wow, I'd rather have clothes that fit in are comfortable. [00:07:00] So I'm not constantly re triggering myself.
Hannah: Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And you know what?
It's like, you can also analyze like what has happened in the last year. Like, obviously you did your dietetic internship, so ballin on a budget, or not even a budget, like non existent money. Okay? Ballin on being broke. So working full time for free, and not only for free, but paying to do the internship.
And it's, I don't know how long yours was. Mine is eight months. How long was yours? Mine
Abbie: was
Hannah: 10 months. Okay. See? Yeah. So basically a whole year of full time work with no, little to no income, you're paying to do it. You know, you're switching locations. There's, you have a, basically a different boss every couple months with a different style and a different personality.
And you're still trying to learn and you're still trying to like show that, you know, stuff, but also like. Ask the right question. It's like a very stressful time. So you're stressed and you know, you probably I have had less time to engage in movement that I enjoy during the internship. Like, I'll just say that [00:08:00] like my schedule is always changing.
So I can't do like the exercises that I love. So my body is probably gonna be like up and down, you know, throughout this time. And so like, you can. You can, yes, like, buy the bigger size because you deserve to be comfortable and clothes are supposed to fit us. We're not supposed to fit into them. But also assess, like, what has happened in the last year?
Like, was this weight gain, like, necessary? Maybe I was, like, under nourishing myself last year. Maybe I was over exercising. Or maybe I just went through a lot. My body just changed. And now as I adopt a new routine and a new schedule and a new self care, like, Plan. You know, maybe my body will go back, but I'm not gonna hold onto this pair of jeans that's like stabbing me in my waist.
Right. With the hopes that my body goes back to the size it was before. Maybe it will, maybe it won't. You know.
Abbie: Exactly. Yeah, exactly. But we can't necessarily hope for that and Right. That can't stop us from doing things in the present moment that would make us feel comfortable. So I need to go by. Right.
new clothes. [00:09:00] And with that, there are some healthy habits that I that aren't clicking for me right now. So those are some tangible action steps that I can take that aren't disordered. Like I need to be. moving my body in a way that feels good, more consistently than I am now. So that's one thing where I'm like, you know, I'm not over exercising, but I need to at least for me, three days a week, at least three and it helps with the dogs that I have to do some walk.
And that I'm just really resonating with longer walks right now versus any HIIT workouts or any cardio. So, all right, I need to go on like three long walks a week. That seems manageable. Always been consistent with that. So I was like, all right, let's do that. It's like a bare minimum and my sleep, my bedtimes.
And my wake times have been very inconsistent and we know, I mean, yeah, it changes your hunger, it keeps, you know, it changes your digestion. It can have you feel more inflamed, so impact
Hannah: your stress, which yeah, can also affect all those things. Yeah,
Abbie: all of those things. Yeah. And I, I [00:10:00] honestly, I feel like that's probably the root of it is like with lack of sleep, you're just more stressed and that's changing your hormones and like all those other things.
Yeah,
Hannah: like what you were saying about, like, your movement has changed and you're not doing it as much as, as you have learned feels comfortable for you. Some people, and like, I just want to highlight, like, everybody's movement preference is different. Like, people like to do different kind of things. You know, different movements.
Like, obviously cardio is good for your cardiovascular health strength. Training is important for like, you know, your bone density, your muscle mass, all of that. You know, so people kinda can, like, go into like, oh, I'm like a lifter and I never do cardio and I'm like, okay, whatever.
I was like super into hit and then which if people don't know that stands for high intensity interval training it's like high impact, like fast movement, you know, it's usually like a 60 minute workout. It's not going to be like a 2 hour lift session. So it's quick. It's high impact. And then I like started to, you know, have like some pains and stuff in my body.
So I dropped that. I started doing [00:11:00] yoga and not even like the strength training yoga, like literally just like the sleeping on the yoga mat, like in the fetal position,
Abbie: yoga,
Hannah: like, like that. And that was what I needed at that time. That was what I needed. And I did that for a few months. And then I kind of like went, transitioned to like walking and then like walking faster, dabbling in a little bit of running here and there, like not anything extreme kind of like exploring, like, you know, my limits with that.
And then I went back to hit. And now I, I like to do like, for you, your thing is three times a week. My thing is like twice a week, you know, but I'm, I'm good if I can do once a week with my schedule and stuff lately. And, and I think like, there can be a lot of shame and judgment. In, you know, the ebbs and flows of our, you know, desire to move our interest in certain, you know, movement methods and styles.
Like we can really get down on herself about, about that. [00:12:00] Like, I was kind of like, I kind of cried when I was like moving away from the HIT training and going into yoga. I was like, Oh, I've just, I've done this so long. And I felt so strong and I'm not going to be strong anymore. I was kind of judging.
Myself and the possible outcomes that could come from shifting my movement style But you have to honor like what your body is asking for in different seasons
Abbie: Yeah, because it might be over taxing Yeah. And then it's having the opposite effect that it leaves you more depleted when exercise should be giving us more energy and endorphins, like that runner's high quote unquote is very real.
So yeah, if seasons aren't necessarily calling for that, we have to give ourselves grace and be flexible. And that's what I like to say, movement versus exercise, because I think when people, Say exercise. They have one definition of what that is. It has to be an hour. I have to be sweating. It has
Hannah: to be at the gym.
Like, yeah, really intense. And yeah,
Abbie: very [00:13:00] formal and no, there's so many different ways to move your body. And in a really busy season, you're more likely to show up for moving your body more consistently and have, you know, the hours and the minutes start to stack up. It's like, Oh wow. Over the course of the week, I ended up doing, you know, a couple hours more than what I was doing before.
It's easier for you to show up a smaller barrier for entry. When there's so many different ways that you can move your body and it just it can look different. You're being more flexible with yourself. Yes
That's so good. Well, a huge thing that you talk about on your page is body neutrality or weight neutrality.
I don't think we've really talked about that too much on the show, but what I have mentioned in previous episodes is what you had mentioned before, where it's not always realistic to be super body positive. And if your reframe is, I love my body. Like you're probably not going to believe that if you were just saying two seconds ago that you hate your thighs.
Just because we can't be body positive, doesn't [00:14:00] mean that we now have permission and should be body negative. So this shift has become, okay, let's try and be more weight neutral. So could you explain kind of what that is, how we find that and how that benefits
Hannah: us? Yeah, so weight neutrality or body, body neutrality for just me as like a woman in the world would look like kind of what we were talking about, like, okay, you noticed that you have gained weight in the last year.
I've noticed like, you know, personal body changes and stuff. I wouldn't say like weight. Gain, but maybe like a shift in body composition a little bit. And so Instead of acknowledging that and being like, oh, I can't believe I gained weight I suck like my body's gross now is awful. i'm not attractive anymore instead of , focusing on that and like staying in the body negative.
It's just like, okay, you know, I gained weight or, , I'm feeling a little more jiggly lately for me. My arms are [00:15:00] jiggling when I brush my teeth. It's kind of like. Just like, oh, this is, this is an observation that I'm making about my body that exists in this world. And it's like data. Obviously my, my muscle mass has changed a little bit.
And let me think about why that could be. Oh, that's because like, I haven't been, able to go to the gym and do my little strength training sessions And so that's why and it's just very like matter of fact And so it's it's without judgment It's without and then let's say like I do get back into it and you know My biceps are popping and stuff and I'm feeling good or whatever.
It's kind of like, okay So, you know, now I'm, I'm strong. Like I gotten back to what feels quote unquote normal for me in regard to like my strength, but it's not like I'm better now than I was before. Does that make
Abbie: sense? Yeah. And I almost think that [00:16:00] takes like some level of maybe nutrition knowledge or knowledge of.
Like maybe even like your menstrual cycle or just like other more tangible facts that could be going on. So it's not like, Oh my gosh, I'm not a failure. It's like, no, you're not a failure. You're just a period in a couple of days. You're in your gluteal phase. We blow at this time. So that can just like logically be like, Oh, okay.
I'm not doing anything wrong. My body's just going through a season. Right. Oh my, I didn't eat enough today or I didn't drink enough water or, you know, I ate something that was really salty yesterday and that that tends to make us more inflamed the next day. Hey, I got less sleep. What are like some other things?
Oh, if you had a really intense workout the day before, yeah, you're probably gonna be more inflamed because your body's repairing your muscles, right? Sending so many nutrients there. It's trying to, you know, repair the muscles that, that were damaged in the workout, which is exactly, that's what naturally happens.
So you can almost. Be more neutral with it and not catastrophize, yes. Yes.
Hannah: Like you're not, you're not, there's no spiral. [00:17:00] There's no like body negative shame based spiral that happens. I like what you said about like, you're about to get your period. So when I'm about to get mine, I like want to inhale all the carbohydrates inside of the grocery store.
And I might be like, Oh my gosh, what is the matter with me? And then obviously like the next day I get my period and of course I am bloated too and stuff and I might like look in the mirror and be like I look like this because I just ate a bunch of carbs but it's not, it's not true like you know the bloating and the craving for carbohydrates like is because I'm about to get my period and that's just what happens to me.
You know, and there's, there's a reason for that in, in our bodies. And then you also said weight neutral. So a weight neutral person would be maybe like a provider, like a weight neutral medical doctor, a weight neutral registered dietitian. That's basically someone like. You or myself who you're a registered dietitian.
I'm loading processing, almost a [00:18:00] registered dietitian. Well, so us as like weight neutral registered dietitians would understand basically the same thing that we would understand for, for our own body. Like if a client, you know, comes up to us in a bigger body, we're not automatically going to be like, yeah, I calculated your BMI and you're overweight.
So we're going to have to fix that. Like, that's not. That's not what we're doing. We're like, okay, like, let's take a look at let's take a look at your habits. You know, what does your sleep look like? What does your movement look like? You know, what is your intake look like? What's what's your stress levels?
What do you have access to in regard to like, you know, a gym or a park or a grocery store? And so we're kind of just, we're not looking at this person and being like, oh my gosh, Their body is bigger than mine and you know, what I deem ideal and so they must be doing something wrong, or they don't have enough willpower, we're not associating weight with morals. and we're not assuming [00:19:00] that, like. Yeah, someone's weight is the result of them not trying hard enough, or not living healthy enough. Cause it's, the reality is that it's, it's so multifactorial that we just, you know, you can't look at someone who is overweight or in a larger body and say like, Oh, you just need to go to the gym.
What do they do five days a week? We don't know. Right. You know, you
Abbie: can't look at someone and assume their habits. So like weight neutrality and this whole concept is really working to untangle that weight means
Hannah: health. Right. Right. Let's say like we're working with someone and then all of a sudden they lose, you know, X amount of pounds, we're not gonna be like, yay.
Oh my gosh, this is great. I'm so glad I'm so happy for you. We would be like, okay, like how did you do that? How did that happen? What happened that, that you lost that weight? And if they say , well, you know, I started skipping dinner and I didn't have breakfast and I only had lunch. And like, we find out that their lunch didn't even have a protein [00:20:00] and stuff.
And they were like exercising for four hours. Like, it's like, okay, this is not good. Now the weight loss isn't, it's not a good thing. It's like, are we promoting health or are we promoting be skinny? No matter what it takes.
Abbie: Yes. Oh, and you know, just in my experience working with so many clients over the last five years, some of our clients that are in smaller bodies, I have the most disordered habits where we have clients that are maybe even 350, 400 pounds that.
Exercise for four or five days a week, their meal prepping, they're hitting their water goal. They're getting adequate. They're meditating journaling in the morning. Like they're doing all of the things and their body's going to sit where, where it naturally wants to sit. And because weight is multifactorial, we can't really say what that is, but their labs are literally perfect where I have clients that are in a smaller body, their cholesterol's through the
Hannah: roof.
Yeah. Yeah. So there's just so. So much to it [00:21:00] and, we just really can't look at someone and know without a shadow of a doubt that they are healthy or unhealthy and, there's hormones that, that come into it. There's genetic predispositions that, that play into it
you don't know like people say it's funny because I'll read comments on Instagram Which is a horrible idea if you ever want to have faith in humanity Don't read Instagram comments because that will just go out the window. I'm like people are so Ridiculous. I think it literally makes me want to like cry.
People will say like the gym bros or whatever that obviously didn't study nutrition and Dietetics will will comment something like Yeah, it's diet and exercise, diet and exercise. I'm like, dude, if it was diet and exercise, it would be like 1 percent of the population would be overweight. If it were that simple, nobody would be in the hospital, hospitals would be shut down.
They wouldn't exist. Medical professionals wouldn't exist. No need for them. You know what I mean? Like, if that [00:22:00] was like the be all end all of, you know, physique and health, it's like... Nobody would need help. That would be the answer. It's more than that. It's so much more than that. And my
Abbie: clients that are in larger bodies, they are like top tier.
They would be at the executive level. If this was, if dieting was a company, they would be the executive, like little professional dieters. It's not for a lack of willpower discipline. Yeah, because they have tried every diet and they have done the best they can. Like they just keep trying, like, because they're just striving to lose weight.
And it's so it's diet culture wants to make it seem like it's our fault for failing and not being able to follow through on the diet when it was a faulty system. Right.
Hannah: The diet was going to fail. The diet is not sustainable. If your health plan has a start date and an end date, it's not. It's not realistic, like what, what happens when it's over?
Why do you have to start being healthy and stop being healthy? Then it's not, then it's not [00:23:00] healthy, you know, cause like it shouldn't. And, you know, we, we talked about different seasons of life where different things are, are more feasible. Like right now it's really hard for me to go to the gym, but it's not, you know, like there's a flow of life that we're not robots.
Abbie: There's a difference between saying, Hey, in this season, this is the healthy habit that I'm going to prioritize, bring more intention to right. Versus saying, I'm doing this cleanse for 30 days.
Hannah: Yeah.
Yeah. They're like, I'm going to try like intermittent fasting, like throughout the holidays. First of all, why would you do that? Don't do that to yourself. Eat the pecan
Abbie: pie. You will be way more out of control with food if you start dieting.
Hannah: And it's like, you know, especially around Thanksgiving and Christmas, like don't just don't do that to yourself.
That makes me miserable. Just thinking
Abbie: about it. Oh my gosh. Wait, I have to tell you something. Oh my gosh. I was on the phone with my mom the other day and I'm so proud of my mom because she is like in the thick of diet culture, but she stood up. She's on the wellness committee for New York state. And I, at first I was like, nervous, I was like, [00:24:00] mom, you're on the wellness committee.
I'm like, but, but she stood up and she stood up in the meeting and they wanted to do this. Don't gain, just maintain. The only thing that should be stuffed this season is the turkey, like step challenge or something. And they were going to weigh everyone, count your steps. Oh my gosh. So my mom stood up in the meeting and was like.
Absolutely not. We are not doing this. It is not your employer's job to be like monitoring your weight, monitoring your steps. That's not their job. They should be monitoring your performance. Hello. Right.
Hannah: Or they could say, Oh yeah, we want to make sure that you guys have time to take care of yourself.
So we're going to give you more PTO so that you can take time off and like go to the spa, get a massage, you know, do the Pilates class that you want to do. Like, you know. It's like, okay, do that. If you give me that, then, then, okay, maybe. But not if you're like trying to control my weight. Like
Abbie: that's weird.
So much shame and just like rooted in diet culture. Like, [00:25:00] is that really your employer's place? So I'm really proud of my mom for, you know, to give her a little shout out. I'm proud of her for standing up in that meeting. And she said, wow, I didn't really realize until I was in that meeting, how much your content.
Has really impacted me and I was like, Oh my gosh, like that just gives me so much joy that she had the language to be able to say that and realize, Oh, this is not right. This is doing people more harm than it is good for someone that kind of grew up with really an almond mom. So for her to be able to see and say that, wow, like that was huge.
So
Hannah: that's awesome. That really is that to see it click in people. who you know like were so, had like diet culture ingrained in their, in the core of their brain. Like it's, to see it click and to hear them like put it together in their own words, you're like, yes. You're like, my work here is done. I'm so happy.
Mission accomplished.
Abbie: You know, for anyone that hasn't worked with, you [00:26:00] know, either of us, but it's listening to the podcast, like just know you can get so much and so much knowledge for yourself and see real transformation and transform people in your lives just by listening to this content and getting a different narrative and starting to challenge what diet culture has been.
Really like brainwashing us with so it really it really can make a
Hannah: difference and brainwashing women You know, can we talk about that for a minute? Like it like I mean obviously like men are not you know Immune to to the wrath of diet culture and I think there's a lot of pressure for like men to be Jacked and ripped and whatever and jawline and you know six foot four or whatever like there is pressure Okay, but but if you look at the creators of All of the the common diets that mostly women do they're all just like old men You know like the South Beach diet [00:27:00] and Adkins diet and the marketing is towards women, you know?
So it's like, why are, why are men trying to tell us what our body should look like? That's weird. That's weird.
Abbie: And whenever we have a negative thought about ourselves, like think about who profits from that. Yeah. You shaming yourself and feeling like you are a failure and that you need to be fixed.
Hannah: Yeah, there was a quote, and I don't know who the quote comes from, so pardon me, the quote giver It says diet culture forces women to face the mirror instead of the world.
And I was like,
Abbie: wow. Wow, that's good. Yeah. That's so true. That's real.
Hannah: Yeah, because if we're hungry, and we're lightheaded, and we're insecure, and just, Yeah. You know, so, like, small. You know, physically, and like, in our head. When I think of like, when I feel most insecure, like, I feel like small, like I want to disappear.[00:28:00]
Like, I don't want to take up space. I don't want my voice to take up space. I don't want my body to take up space. I don't want my, you know, stupid opinions to take up space. And like, you know, why do we have to be like, small? We're allowed to exist. We're allowed to speak and to exist and to take up space and to, you know, go out there and like, conquer the world!
Conquer your thing! You know, if your thing is like marketing and sales, conquer it. If your thing is like nutrition and dietetics, go, go, go do it. Like, if your thing is like fashion or like... You know, being a stay at home mom, which is a full time job, by the way, then be, like, do it and be, be the best at it.
I just think like how much time is wasted, like if our mirrors could keep track of how long we spent in front of them, nitpicking every inch of our bodies, like, like at the end of our life, how much time have we spent in front of the mirror and how much of that time [00:29:00] was like, Oh, like, I just love my outfit.
Like, you know, how much of that time was like positive.
Abbie: Yeah, yeah, that's so good. I hope that people really, really think on that. And the next time that you do look in the mirror. Maybe think like, could I say something positive to myself? If you have a negative thought, maybe we can work to reframe that.
And hopefully this episode will give you some reframes. So Hannah, kind of walk us through, like, what are some common things that you hear your clients, your audience saying, and how do you help them reframe
Hannah: that? Yeah. So going off of what we were just talking about right now, like one thing that I personally do for myself, like talking about the genes and the body changes and stuff.
If I put on a pair of jeans and I see like. Some skin's bulging and stuff instead of being like like I'm just so like fat today I could say like these pants are not serving me right now. What else can I wear that's more comfy? So I'm acknowledging that I don't like the pants. I'm acknowledging that I don't feel comfortable in them, but I'm not blaming my body And then there's also a solution because I'm going to change [00:30:00] out of the pants and find better ones that, in my closet, you know, that serve me.
Another thing that people say that's more like food related is, I want to eat less chemicals. First of all, take a chemistry class. Everything's chemicals.
Yeah, so throw out the H2O because that's a chemical compound, but anyway, everything's chemicals, but like, so it's like, well, what are you, what are you actually trying to say? Like maybe you're eating a lot of packaged foods. Maybe that's, that's how you feel with like long ingredient lists, which, you know, usually packaged foods have like a pretty hefty ingredient list.
So maybe what you're really saying is that you would like to prepare more food at home from scratch. So I'd like to start cooking more food at home. That's a reasonable thing to say. And you're kind of saying the same kind of thing, you know, with more like fresh whole ingredients and then I can make it.
That's okay. Right. Getting to the root of it. Yes. Yes. And you're not judging the packaged foods [00:31:00] that do serve a purpose when you're on a budget or on a crunch for time you know, so yeah, that, that's, that's another reframe.
Abbie: You can also say to that too, like, okay, I acknowledge that I'm in a really, like when I was in my dietetic internship, I really had to rely on a lot of convenience foods, pre packaged foods, stuff that I could just throw in the microwave, frozen dinners.
And I just had to acknowledge like, I'm in a season right now. I have to give myself grace. I have a goal of maybe not have, like I'm making more meals from scratch at home. That's not realistic for me right now. So I'm just going to give myself grace and leave it at that and acknowledge the season that you're in and know that that's, that's okay.
Hannah: A hundred percent, a hundred percent, because I always tell people, cause people will, you know, find out that I studied. Nutrition and dietetics. I'm becoming a registered dietitian. They'll be like, okay. Well, what do you think about like Wendy's or like McDonald's or like Chick fil a or whatever and I'm like It's better to eat than [00:32:00] just, oh my god, my watch is talking to me.
Abbie: You're like, yeah, your watch is like, yeah, I don't have an answer
Hannah: for that. I'm like, yeah, I was like, that's exactly what I was going to say. Thank you, Siri. I better not say her name or she'll just jump in as an extra guest on here. So people will ask me like, what do you think about like fast food restaurants?
Like, should I eat it or what should I do? And I'm like. Okay, I'm just thinking about myself like Christmas shopping, you know You're out longer than you plan to be and you're suddenly starving instead of like forcing yourself to stay Starved just to go like eat and make something at home like if you want to go pick something up because you're literally famished like Do it.
It's better to eat than to starve. It's okay. Like, that one, like, moment. Sometimes I'm out running errands. I always, like, relate this to Christmas time. That's when I'm, like, busiest, out, like, there's traffic. Sometimes I'm like, dang, I really want some Wendy's right now. And, like, that's fine. You know, you get it.
You enjoy it. You're like, oh, I remember when I used to eat this when I was younger. And then you move on. You nourish yourself. You move on. Or if you're on like a long road trip [00:33:00] and like you run out of snacks and there's traffic and it's taking six hours instead of four, like you go to a rest stop and there's like just a Taco Bell, like get it.
It's okay. Nourish your body. Your body's not going to be like, Oh. This is Taco Bell. Like, we're gonna turn this just straight into fat on your body. We're not even gonna use it for your brain or anything else. Like, you know, your body just breaks it, breaks down the food. So, you know, don't, don't stress too hard about stuff like that.
So like, yeah, convenience foods serve a purpose and we don't have to have shame and, and judgment around them. So, another thing that, that people say is a lot of times people will say, I feel fat, and there's a lot around that and it might be too much for a person to process at one time. So, my first question would be like, well, why is fat inherently bad?
But that's like a whole topic for another day. But so if you're saying I feel fat [00:34:00] and I have said this before in the past, I have felt like this. I have very close friends that say this and feel this and what I challenge myself and others, you know, in that moment. Because in that moment you don't want to hear why is that bad blah blah.
You're like, I feel like crap Just leave me alone. Stop giving me a lecture So what I challenge myself to think about is to dig deeper and be like, okay what I am usually feeling is like extra bloated Or maybe I'm just like, you know, you know, again, like the clothes are just not serving me. Like I, I feel bloated.
I feel, I feel uncomfortable with my body right now.
---
Abbie: Fat is not a feeling. It's
Hannah: not a feeling. And that's why, yes, fat is not a feeling. That's why I encourage people to dig deeper. I'm like. What are you really feeling and maybe you're feeling so insecure that you want to like shrink, right?
And so you feel like too insecure to take up space right now [00:35:00] And so you want to feel smaller so you can identify it as like I'm just feeling really insecure about myself today So and you know I don't like saying like I feel fat because it's like why is that bad fat is not a feeling and like, you know If if you are fat like you don't have to feel bad just because you're fat like, you know what I mean?
so using it as like a a complaint about yourself. Like fat doesn't inherently mean like ugly. And so it's just, it's just a lot to, to unpack there, but yeah, fat does not, it's not a feeling, it's not a feeling. So like dig
Abbie: deeper. Yes. Dig deeper. And once you identify what that is, whether that's you're feeling insecure, you're feeling more bloated or just frustrated stress that day, lonely, is there's so many different things that you could be feeling that day.
Once you get to the root of it, acknowledging, even though I feel this. I still deserve to nourish myself.
Hannah: Yes. Yes. I still deserve, you know, to take care of myself and to nourish myself and it's like if I'm having [00:36:00] like a hard body image day, you know, and I'm really drained and I really want to nap and then I see myself in the mirror, I'm not going to force myself to run on the treadmill because I'm feeling bad about myself.
If I need to rest, I'm going to rest like, you know. You gotta, you gotta be able to take care of yourself. And again, like, that's the difference of like, the people that are healing coming out of this disordered lifestyle, their, the thoughts might still pop up every now and then, but it's the actions that follow the thoughts.
You know, what are you doing with those thoughts? Are you still choosing to take care of yourself regardless of your emotions about yourself and how you look?
Abbie: Yeah, and in my experience coaching clients through this, they need to first acknowledge the thoughts and get deep. Like, what are we really feeling before their actions can really change?
But, but it takes time. So give yourself grace in that process, but acknowledging your thoughts, bringing more awareness to it and realizing that these thoughts aren't serving you and working to get to the root. What am [00:37:00] I like? This is what I'm saying to myself, but what am I really feeling? What do I mean by that?
Then you're from there that unlocks a whole other layer. Okay. I can sit with this, or I'm going to have to sit with this negative emotion for a little bit. What's a kind of healthier way to cope. That's maybe like outside of food. If you typically turn to food to cope, And how do I kind of cope with this in a non disordered way where I still am nourishing myself and still respecting my
Hannah: body?
Yeah. So moving away from destructive coping mechanisms to productive coping skills is important. Very important for all of us. Another thing that people say is. Like, I just want to cut out carbs, I just want to cut out carbs and I'm like, okay, we need carbs. Number one. Number two. What are you really feeling?
Like, are you feeling like maybe like your, your days have been a little carb heavy, you know, we [00:38:00] need them, but maybe like you feel like you haven't been getting enough protein. You want to, you know, have some more non starchy vegetables and stuff. And. That's like more of a, a concrete statement to say like, I think I need to like amp up the protein a little, or I think I need to prioritize protein a little in the next few meals.
Like, you know, that's like a concrete statement that you can take action from, but saying like, I just want to cut carbs. It's like very extreme. There's judgment. And then it's kind of just like, you know, but you're not like making a plan that you can stick to because again, like, that's like. I want to cut carbs.
I want to go on keto. And then how long is that going to last? How are you going to feel? How long is it going to last? But saying like, I'd like to start prioritizing protein. Then you can like look up different protein sources or ask your registered dietitian. And then you can decide which ones you like combining plant based with, you know, animal protein, if that's something that you do.
And then finding a fun carb to go with it. [00:39:00] It's more of a concrete statement that really expresses how you actually feel and gives you something to move with. you know, gives you, gives you a solution that you can take.
Abbie: I like that. Like not being so extreme, but say, Hey, I'm still going to have carbs because I need carbs.
Our body's preferred and primary energy source, but I need to bring more intention to what I've been lacking. That doesn't mean I have to, just because you're having more protein doesn't mean you have to have less carbs or we have to give them up entirely. It's just a shift, shift in priorities.
Temporarily, or intention really. So good. I love this.
Hannah: Me too. No, I love it. And it's good. It's good to talk about it. It's good to, cause it's good. It's good for us too. Cause I don't know about you, but my brain is not like, you know, perfect all the time every day. Like, you know, I get tired. I get overwhelmed.
I'm like, ah, like last night I was feeling like I, I had a really long drive from the site that I'm rotating at right now. And there was so much [00:40:00] traffic. I just wanted to get home. I was tired. My jeans were like stabbing into me. I had like some like like a mini bread thing, like bag of that in the car, like kind of like one of those little things that you put like jam on or whatever.
And I was like, Oh, I'm so hungry. And so I literally like, just like opened it and was like eating it while I was driving. And I felt better. Cause I was hungry. I had like so much though. And I was like, Oh, kind of, kind of ate. a little too much there. And then I got home and I was like, Oh, like I just felt like I just wanted to take off my clothes that I had been wearing for like 12 hours at that point.
I just wanted to take a shower. My hair was dirty and my fiance was like, do you want to go to dinner tonight? And what I wanted to say was I never want to eat ever again in my life. Like I just felt so like full and bloated and tired and I wanted to take a shower and I didn't want anyone to talk to me.
And so I was like, go away. You know, like what I should have said or what I could have said would have been like, I feel so like I just feel so yucky right now and like I just ate, [00:41:00] you know, a ton of that whatever over there and like I'm just like so not hungry right now that that doesn't sound appetizing to me, but let me take a shower, blow dry my hair, and then we can talk about dinner.
And like, obviously, by the time dinner was ready, like I ate it and I was hungry, you know, but in that moment, you're just like. Well, you know, like,
Abbie: you just feel really
Hannah: hungry. Yeah, I like wasn't hungry and I was like feeling yucky. I had just driven for like an hour or not really driven. I was just sitting in traffic for like an hour.
So I was just so irritable. So sometimes we can just say things that are so extreme, like in a heightened emotional state, but it's like, you know, put words to it. Like, I just like shoveled a bunch of those whatever into my mouth and food doesn't sound appetizing to me right now, so I can't even think about where I want to eat for dinner.
But like, check in with me later about it. Check in with me in like 30 minutes, and I'll be good
Abbie: especially if you had something that was like just carbs, like we burned through that so quick. Yes. Like you're gonna be hungry soon
Hannah: after that. And I totally would. I totally was.[00:42:00]
And dinner was great.
Abbie: Oh, good. No, but that's a really real example. Yeah. That's so real. Anyway. Yeah. Thank you for sharing that.
Hannah: Do you want to go over like more things that like people say that we can reclaim? Yeah, absolutely. I don't know. Like, what are some things that you hear?
Because I. You know, for me, I've been in the eating disorder space for a little while in regard to the population that I've been working with. And so there really is just a lot about about body image and stuff and reframing that, but I'm curious to know, like, have you heard anything that I haven't mentioned yet from the people that you work with and maybe like you don't have a reframe for it. Maybe we can come up with one.
Abbie: Yeah, I have a couple clients right now that are going through some like the diagnostic process. They don't really know what's going on, but they just feel so often they're kind of in this waiting period.
I have a client that's like waiting for a biopsy. I have another one that's like [00:43:00] waiting to get in with a specialist. And so they're kind of in that waiting and just feeling so frustrated with their health because they're like, I don't know what right action to take because I don't really know what's going on with my body.
So they're kind of feeling like they need to do something and take action now, and they are falling victim to different ads that they're seeing different, different supplements and just like crazy things. And one of my clients ended up taking what's that one supplement, Ashwagandha or
Hannah: something?
Oh, Ashwagandha. Yes. Is
Abbie: that it? So bad. And then her liver enzymes were through the roof. Like it was literally doing liver damage from taking the supplement that she thought was helping her. Like it was just so crazy. So I think there's, I'm just sensing at the time of this recording, I have several clients that are very frustrated in the waiting.
They're frustrated with their bodies that their bodies aren't working properly. And because that's something that we say to like, if someone's like, Oh, I hate my stomach. That can be a neutral reframe. It's like, I have a stomach that functions. I have a body that functions. Right. [00:44:00] What do you do if like, you feel like your body is just fighting against you and you really want answers.
You feel like pressure to take action now. When you probably just need to like sit, relax and wait.
Hannah: I think a good reframe, something to that, they could just maybe like tell themselves is, I want, you know, my body and I to be on the same team. And I think a goal for them maybe could be like waking up and identifying what their body needs in that day because every day changes.
And then if you're going through different health issues that maybe you don't really have like a diagnosis or a treatment plan for, you know, it's, it's important to take it one day at a time. And then I think identifying that rest is really important and stress. Stress is inflammatory. Stress is not good.
So if we're stressed, and I've been there, because I am, I am a stressy person. I am [00:45:00] quite the stressy girl. So it's like, I have been there, where you're like, so stressed about your health, that it's doing more harm than good. So, you know, there's, there's power in the pause. of just sitting and identifying what does my body need today?
And you know, maybe it's like, Oh, I said I was going to work out three times a week and, and blah, blah, blah. And I've only done it once and it's already Thursday or whatever. It's like, okay, I, that was my goal. I made that goal last week. Let's just say, and today I'm just so exhausted. And I don't know why I'm exhausted.
Logically, I shouldn't be. But my body is, and so either I'm going to decide to do like a light walk or I'm just not going to move very much today and I'm just going to rest and like, and be okay with that. Be okay with that decision.
Abbie: And not thinking so far down the line and feeling like you need a plan and you got to do all these things.
It's like, [00:46:00] just think about today, the present moment. How can I honor myself and what's the next best action step? Right. Right. That's good. That's good. Another thing that's been coming up a lot is comparison where people, you know, they walk into a room, they're constantly like kind of checking themselves and how they compare to other people, social media, a hundred percent, like we're just constantly comparing ourselves to other people.
Like, Oh, I should look like that. Or like they're how other people are living or looking. They're making that mean something about themselves because I don't look like that. Yeah. Mm. That means I'm doing something wrong. Mm.
Hannah: I, you know, I, I feel like we all walk around very insecure and kind of like feeling like all eyes are on us.
You know, but if we all feel like that, then really all eyes are on, you know, that the person, right? Like we're just so hyper focused on how we look, how we're sitting. How are my clothes fitting? Like, is my stomach sticking out? Like, you know, are [00:47:00] people judging my outfit? Everyone's so self centered.
Abbie: Yes.
Concerned about themselves. Yes.
Hannah: And then when you look at someone else, you're like, oh, they're hair like so clean. I should have watched mine this morning. Like their skin is like so much clearer like You know, their, their makeup just looks so much better. And like, what am I doing wrong? And, and, you know, that outfit looks so cute on them.
Like it wouldn't look cute on me. Like, I feel like everybody else in my brain, like when I see them looks probably a million times better than they perceive themselves. And then I'm like, I wish. So what I've been trying to do, this is like a personal assignment that I'm working on, is that when I see other people, like I really look at other people and I'm like, they're so like beautiful and cool and like unique in their own way.
Like, I just, it might be like creepy, but I just like watch like the way that people like walk around and like the movements that they make when they, when they talk and when they're interacting. I'm like, people are so beautiful and like, it, it's probably true that people think that about me when they see me.
In, you know, 3D in real [00:48:00] life, like, you know, so I'm like over here, like, admiring everybody and I could take that and turn it into like, Oh, I probably look like a little hermit crab over here, like, you know, hunched over and frizzy hair and whatever, like, you know, I can take that and, and. And, you know, elevate everyone else and judge myself.
And again, that's like shrinking and feeling small. Or I can be like, Oh my gosh, she's so cool. She's so pretty. Like she's just, everything was great on her. Like, you know, and like, I bet people think that about me. You know, and I can just say maybe they don't. Maybe they think I'm a lunatic. Yeah, but that's, but it's fine.
Abbie: No, but They probably do. Yeah. And honestly, if you think about someone that you love and you care about and you're describing them to someone else that doesn't know them, like you would pick, Oh my gosh, this person's so funny. They're a hard worker. Oh my God, they just, they slay everything they do. You, oh my gosh, you would absolutely love them.
Like they're, they're such a loyal friend. They're a good listener. Like you would go through all of these different things and qualities about them, you probably wouldn't even mention how they look because [00:49:00] it's not important. It's honestly the least interesting thing about
Hannah: them. Yeah. And honestly too, like.
When I see different people, like, I, there's a lot of like, body diversity in my life and like, the, in the people that I interact with, and I just look, because like, sometimes I struggle with body image, like, it's just a fact, you know and I don't think that we'll ever be like, free from it, no matter like, how much we help other people, like, it's on hard days.
And I find it's usually like when I'm tired and overwhelmed, I want to take it out on something that I can see and what I see is myself. But I see people in, in different bodies than me and I'm like, they're so confident. They're so cool. Like they dress like so nicely and I'm like, I can do the same thing.
I can, wear the jeans that are, that are high waisted, that, sometimes I feel insecure in, and I don't have to put a jacket over regardless of my perceived, what I perceive as flaws, because other people might be like, dang girl, look at her [00:50:00] rocking that outfit.
Like, you know, cause that's what I think about
Abbie: other people confidence. It's like, Oh wow. I was thinking about wearing a jacket to cover up my arms, but she's not, she's not like I can do that too. Like you don't know who else you're inspiring too. And I think we have to remember if we all exercise the same way, ate the same way.
We would not look the same. We would not. We would still have very different bodies. And when we look to others to dictate how we should look, we really reject who we
Hannah: are. Yeah. It's so true. It's so true and I really do and it's sad because you know you mentioned social media and like this topic of comparison of like I sometimes I see like on obviously on my my Explore page it's like, you know nutrition and whatever and dietetics and everything and sometimes there's like exercise things I'm like that girl is so toned and whatever and I start looking at the things that she does I'm like, well, I kind of like I do those workouts and then I'm like Hannah Even if we ate the same, even if [00:51:00] we moved the same, even if we lived in the same house and did all the same things, We would not, our bodies would not be identical.
And that's a beautiful thing. That's such a beautiful thing, you know, and we, like, instead of like, Again, instead of seeing someone and, like, elevating them in your mind and then turning that back around and tearing yourself down, like, Dang, that girl looks good. And then I just move on. And I don't have to flip it around and, like, compare myself and think about me.
What is she doing that I'm not doing? And how can I look like her? Like, I used to do that a lot when I was younger. I used to do that a lot. And I think that was when, like, The Victoria's Secret Angels were like, really big, and like, you know, their, their, their fake tans, and the bikinis, and the, their workout plan, and their eating plan.
It's like, you know, I'm like, trying so hard to be someone else, and I will never be someone else. So like, how can I, like, help myself, and like, set myself up for success to be the best me [00:52:00] that I can be? And like, let my body exist as it wants to exist and, do the movement that I find most joyful and fulfilling and, eat the foods that nourish me and make me feel good, which might be different than than other people and just like letting all of that.
Be and be okay with it.
Abbie: Yeah. Yeah. It's okay to sit with that and it's not realistic to be super positive every single day. It's okay to have difficult body image days and we can acknowledge that I'm having a difficult body image day and , I'm still a good person, right? You know, right. So good. So good.
Yes. Oh, Hannah. Thank you so much for all of your wisdom today. All of your reframes, just talking about the, the nuance, you say everything was such grace and I just really appreciate your perspective. And I know that our listeners are going to want more of you. So where can we find you? Where do you hang out?
Hannah: Yes, I am all over the Internet. You can find [00:53:00] me on Instagram, which is my favorite place to be. I love social media. I really do. I can't live with it. Can't live without it. You can find me on Instagram. It's at every body nutrition and there is a period between every word. So it's every dot body dot nutrition.
I'm also on TikTok, you can just look up my name, Hannah Calhoun, I actually don't really know my TikTok username, but it's more of just, it's like a little bit of like nutrition and body image, and then also me just being weird and trying to be funny. So if you're interested in seeing that, go ahead.
We're here for it girl, we are here for it. But yeah, just head to my Instagram and you can pretty much, you know, find, find anything from there. Yeah. So, and I love to chat with people. So anyone can DM me and stuff. And, and I love a good conversation about all of this.
Abbie: So good. Me too. So we will link all of that up in the show notes.
And our last question that we ask all of our guests is what's something you're going to do this week to make your week better? I
Hannah: think I am going [00:54:00] to really try and just be present. I really just want to be present in every moment that I'm in. I tend to like be in my head. And kind of future trip be like, Oh, I have to do this.
I have to do that. But I really want to be present with the people around me and, you know, whatever it is that I'm, that I'm doing in each moment in this coming week. That's
Abbie: good. That's good. Oh, yeah. Hannah, thank you so much for being on
Hannah: today. I appreciate you. You know, it was so fun. I love talking to you and I really appreciate you having me here.
Yeah.
Hey y'all, thanks again for listening to the Be About Being Better podcast. I so appreciate you. If this episode made you laugh, smile, think about yourself or your life differently, in any way making your life better, I empower you to share this show with three [00:55:00] people who, just like you, need to hear this message and have this type of transformation in their lives.
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